July 2006 – Page 8 – OfficiallyScrewed.com

Do You Know This Moron?

July 3, 2006Mulder

So you know, that is the National War Memorial this asshole is urinating on.

Morons like this should be strung up by their eyelids and kicked in the balls until they blink. I think if someone knows anyone who wears a tan belt with bell bottom blue jeans and white bowling shoes they should give this guy a good swift kick in the teeth.

People need to take their kids by the hand at a young age and teach them what this memorial represents. I’ve done it every Canada Day we spend downtown with my kids and will continue to do so until they get it.

H/T to DustMyBroom

ADDENDUM The CBC had pictures of two more assholes. I took screenshots and have cropped them into this blogpost. I am willing to bet that these guys have probably bragged to friends about their accomplishments. These guys shouldn’t be too hard to find. Someone has to know who they are or was with them on this night.

Asshole 3 urinating on War Memorial 2006

Simply one of the saddest displays of Canadianism I have heard of. These guys wre obviously not down on Parliament Hill to celebrate Canada’s birthday, but probably just there for the party and concert. If you ever have the urge to go to Parliament Hill for A Party and not THE PARTY, don’t bother. I am sure the majority of Canadians would prefer you just stay home, get drunk there and piss in your toilet or your pants when you pass out.

Assholes. I hope your friends see these photos and razz you until you go down to the local Legion and scrub their toilets for a few weeks as a way to apologize for your disrespect and disgrace.

It's Official – Larry Zolf Is An Unknown Knob

July 3, 2006Mulder

After reading about Mr. Zolf on a few other websites and taking my poll results into consideration, it is official. Larry Zolf, semi-retired CBC Political reporter is an Unknown Knob!!

Total votes: 29

Larry Zolf is a Knob – 21 votes
Larry Zolf is NOT a Knob – 0 votes
Who is Larry Zolf? – 8 votes

I know my site is visited by a majority of conservative voters, but when Larry can’t even get a single vote stating he is NOT a knob, then I have to wonder.

a) He is an unknown knob, or

b) The same sick fascination that had over 227,000 people vote to boil Larry the Lobster on Saturday Night Live back in 1982 has afflicted the readers of my site. (Note: Larry the Lobster was saved because 239,000 people voted to NOT boil him.)

My vote is with a) considering even a tasty crustacean had more compassion from voters.

Re-Aim Traffic Cameras At Gas Station Price Boards

July 3, 2006Mulder

Today while heading out to meet a friend for a GST reduced Tim Horton’s coffee, I heard Ron Corbett of the Ottawa Citizen on CFRA talking about the fact that five provinces now have some sort of control over the price of gas. He was looking for people to call in with their opinions so I decided to make the call.

I told Ron that I would rather get a fair shake with supply and demand. Microeconomics 101. Setting prices will create shortages or surplusses.

I then suggested we take all the traffic cameras lining the highways and aim them at gas station price boards. It would not take long before collusion was easily proved and irrefutable. A simple analysis of any gas stations tanker purchases cross referenced with the cost they charge would easily prove this.

Ron actually enjoyed the idea and I hope he runs with it in one of his upcoming articles.

My Canada Day Was All Over The Place

July 1, 2006Mulder

Today was a fun day in the sun (and sometimes very light showers) but mostly sun.

I started off watching a bit of world cup soccer, then went out front and shot some hoops with my son. Then as I mentioned earlier I shot downtown to hang out with the thousands of other people in downtown Ottawa.

The first picture below is of some of the musicians/buskers that dot the streets on Canada Day. This was a small drum circle. (Nothing like the 30 or 40 drum circles I have seen at Grateful Dead concerts but they were pretty hot nonetheless.).

We hooked up with some friends and enjoyed walking around near the Hill until we got to the War Memorial. I walked around the memorial holding Cookies hand and explained to her (for the second time in her short life) what it was for and what the different years meant. Cookie still isn’t quite sure what it is about but I still explain it to her so one day she will know. Below is a picture of her (on the left) and a teammate from gymnastics (giving the peace sign).

We then made our way up the road to have dinner at Dunn’s Deli. Mr. Dunn himself was out working the floor. I had a pretty decent smoked meat sandwich. Not Schwartz’s mind you, but not bad.

After that, T-Bone and I took off back to the car. On the way I got a nice pic of the world’s longest melted skating rink. a.k.a. The Rideau Canal.

We beat the traffic out and made it back to Kanata in time to shoot a few more hoops in the driveway before heading out to park near Walter Baker park where the local fireworks were on and 54-40 was playing. The fireworks started a bit early but we got to enjoy the 20 minute show and could hear 54-40 playing a tune or two. But we were doing it all from my truck because the rain was starting.

A short trip home, and a fill up at 100.2/litre (9 cents cheaper than this morning) and here I am enjoying my first (and second) beer of the weekend.

I hope everyone else out there had a great Canada Day with family and friends.

On that note, I wish to make one final statement. Something that I have not seen anywhere online today. A grand omission on the part of many. Despite our well wishes to each other on Canada Day, we all forget to wish the grand dame her just dues.

Happy 139th Birthday Canada!!!

You are holding up well after 139 years. And might I add that you are looking way better than you did last year and I am willing to wager you look even better on your 140th birthday.

ADDENDUM For those who have never been to Ottawa, the building in the far background of the top picture, i.e. behind the drummers, is the famous Chateau Laurier.

Happy Dominion/Canada Day

July 1, 2006Mulder

Well, I was planning on getting over to the celebrations in Kanata to see 54-40 tonight, but an emergency has had me called downtown where Cookie is taking part in Canadian Gymnaestrada. This means instead of an easy drive, easy free parking situation, I will be heading out shortly to trek down to Parliament Hill.

Alas, 54-40 will have to wait for me. But these people will not.

The plus is that Cookie, T-Bone, the better half and I will be together Canada Day instead of being scattered across Ottawa.

For those with eagle eyes and a very boring personal life, you can click here to view what Parliament Hill looks like through out the day and try to spot me. I will be wearing red and white. HAHAHA!!

I hope everyone has a safe and wonderful holiday.

Got Tingling Hands? See Your Chiropractor!!

July 1, 2006Mulder

I don’t normally talk about my physical ailments on this blog, but this one is aimed at the Yellow Bellied McShifty who cut chiropractic subsidies when he took over as our premier. It also may help some of you who notice symptoms that may pertain to a pinched nerve.
About three weeks ago, I started having problems with both of my hands tingling depending on how I positioned them. Whether it was my left hand resting easily on my car door with the window rolled down or my right arm folded with my hand resting under my pillow at night. It happened to both hands while sitting at my desk sometimes and other countless ways.

I discounted the idea that my hands were falling asleep because as soon as I moved them and gave them a shake the tingling went away without the usual pins and needles that someone gets when an appendage falls asleep.

On Wednesday night I woke up with REALLY bad tingling in both hands and a feeling of pressure that made my hands feel like they were going to explode.

So Thursday afternoon I was off to my chiropractor. I described my symptoms to him and he held my neck at a specific angle while he twisted my arm inward with my hand held backwards like I was taking money from behind me. (Being a Conservative, he joked “like you’re a Liberal taking a payoff” which had me in stitches). Lo and behold the numbness was there right away.

He had me assume the “Liberal position” with my other hand and the tingling was the same.

He performed a quick adjustment on my neck and I have slept peacefully for the past two nights. I have also noticed that the tingling is pretty much gone. I think one or two more trips to my chiropractor over the next two weeks and I should be good as new.

The only problem is that the hit to my wallet is more than it used to be thanks to yellow-belly. But a small price considering the dramatic effects chiropractic has given me.

Thanks Dr. Jeff!!

P.S. A few years ago I dislocated a rib golfing over the weekend. A problem which would have taken a month or more on muscle relaxants and bedrest to correct. This same chiropractor adjusted my back on the following Monday and Thursday and I was golfing the next weekend. Being a golfer himself, he knew what caused my dislocation, told me to keep my forward arm straight in the backswing to prevent it happening again. Not only did he fix my back but he fixed my golf game. I shot several strokes better that following weekend with the tip.
Please tell us about your chiropractic story in the comments below!!

Liberals, Kingsley And That Little Boy Who Cries Wolf

July 1, 2006Mulder

I have been surfing both Tory and Liberal blogs regarding whether or not convention fees count as donations and I have noticed the following.

1) Phantom Observer (a blogging tory) has some of the most valid arguments out there and has done his homework on the elections act. Nice job my friend. When are you coming back to Ottawa? P.O. has some links and assessments of the current elections act and the only thing clear in the elections act about this issue is the ambiguity.

2) In Phantom Observer’s comments someone named Eugene Parks. You all remember Eugene Parks don’t you? Kate already destroyed his credibility. You can read about this loser here, here and here. In any case, I didn’t see any emails or screenshots at his site. Just links to other blogs harping about this issue. Eugene is the same guy who tried to get the blogging tories shut down based on exceeding the donation laws. Some people just don’t know when to quit. to add to this point the guy is posting the same post all over the web promoting his site which points to a site that displays his emails. The same post has been spotted on other sites as well.

3) There there is sonemamedia. Again, emails which quote our friend Eugene, above which are the emails which Eugene claims help prove his case. Ironically, when someone is so hell bent on carving up the tories, his lack of credibility destroys sonemamedia’s blog posts. It looks like a which came first the sonemamedia posts using Eugene’s emails or Eugene pointing everyone to sonemamedia’s website … errr … sort of like the chicken and the egg(head).

4) Then we have Elections Canada head honcho, J.P. Kingsley. This is the man who can’t even keep non Canadian citizens from voting in our elections. How is he supposed to be able to sort out a mess that pertains to an ambiguous Elections Act. If it would mean revamping elections canada and the elections act, I would almost beg the tories to open the books and expose the flaws that let an American student at U of T get a ballot in the last election.

5) No one seems to be mentioning much about the Liberal leadership convention or past policy conventions except the Tories. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander so if the Tories have to open their books, the Liberals will have to as well.

6) What I find especially heinous here is that the Liberals are asking that the Tories put $1.7 Million into an account should their be any improper handling of the convention fees. I would like to ask the Liberals to put $100 Million (the amount that might have gone missing to Liberal friendly ad firms and was potentially kicked back to the Liberal Party) into a similar account until we find out where the Adscam money went. Oh wait … the Liberal Party of Canada doesn’t have any money. Maybe they should just declare bankruptcy and all go join the NDP. I bet Bob Rae would love that!