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CBC's Air Farce – A Truly Biased Farce Of A Network

January 2, 2007Mulder

On New Year’s Eve I recorded the CBC Air Farce special entitled 2006 The Year of the Farce and took a leisurely look at it the following day. Holy Biased Humour Batman!!

I watch Air Farce and have for years but I don’t think I have ever seen them this lopsided in their humour. I can understand a few extra ribs at the party in power but this New Year’s Eve 60 minute special was ridiculously slanted.

By my rough count the ratio of jokes poking fun at the four parties was as follows:

Conservatives were made fun of about 25 times
Liberals were made fun of about 4 times
Dippers were made fun of once or twice
BQ were not made fun of at all

Is this what politically incorrect humour has become? Of those 25 or so jibes, 20 of them were aimed at Stephen Harper with 3 (and possibly 4) attempting to tie him to George Bush, 2 aimed at his weight, 3 or 4 aimed at painting him as anti-gay, and even one pro-life comment which floored me because never have I heard Stephen Harper make any pro-life remark.

Again, I want to emphasize, I usually laugh along with Air Farce. But this blatant slanting against the current Tory government is simply not a fair indication of politics in Canada. In a year when the Dippers had a policy convention and the Liberals had a leadership convention, there had to be some prime targets for humour that simply did not appear in the show.

What gets my goat the most is that even in two attempts to start ribbing Dion and Layton, the humour gets twisted and both times Harper ends up taking the punchline on the chin.

I really think the CBC ought to readdress the inequality in their political humour.

To view a 10 minute assessment, click the video below once:

If you cannot see the above video, try clicking the link below.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlBfNvndrx8

ADDENDUMGerry makes a great comment below. I, myself, have commented to the Air Farce crew how disappointed I was at their biased New Year’s Eve special and encourage you to do the same by clicking this link.

Wednesday Humour

December 20, 2006Mulder

In a busy Parisian cafe, a tourist is sitting alone, enjoying a crème caramel. Another tourist approaches:

Me sit here?

No problem…

Thank you, very nice…

Are you on vacation?

Me, I arrive yesterday…

What country are you from?

Norway. You?

From Quebec.

Quebec? Me not know Quebec…

Quebec… near the Atlantic, next to Ontario, the Great Lakes…

No, me not know these places.

Never mind then, I’m from Canada…

Ah! Canada! Canada I know! So why you tell me you come from Quebec?

Because, my first country is Quebec!

Oh, you were born in Quebec and immigrated to Canada….

No, no, I was born in Quebec and I stay in Quebec…

Oh, then your father is from Canada?

No, no, my father, my mother, my wife, my dog, everybody, they come from Quebec…

So why you say Canada?

For Christ sake, because you say you don’t know where is Quebec!

OK, but if you say you not know Norway, me I not say that my country is Japan…

Crap! Canada isn’t Japan. Canada, it’s my country.

Oh, your country not Quebec anymore?

My country is Quebec. But my country, it can be Canada too, if the
person I speak to not know where is Quebec, Tabarnak!

Me not understand…

Look, it’s simple: I come from the Province of Quebec, in the country of Canada.

Ok! But me not ask you what province you’re from, I ask you what country. Me, I come from Lofoten region in Norway, but I answer you Norway when you ask me what country I come from…

I know, I’m not stupid, Coulisse! But me, when they ask me what country I come from, I answer Quebec. Even if it’s the name of my province. For me, it’s my country.

Oh, now I understand. You are a separatist, you want your Quebec province to be your country…

Are you crazy, Hostie? I don’t want to know nothing from that crap!

Me, I not understand anything anymore.

I tell you before, it’s simple! You ask me what country I come from, I answer Quebec because Quebec is my country, but I don’t really want it to be my country, it would be too much trouble. I just want to say it. So, why don’t you just let me say it?

Me all mix up. You have passport from what country: Quebec or Canada?

CANADA, Hostie!

So why you not tell me Canada right away?

Because it don’t feel right. For me, Canada is Anne Murray, the Calgary Stampede, the Mounted Police, SARS, it’s not my home all that. Home, it’s La Famille Plouffe, Saraphin Poudrier, La P’tite Vie, Falix Leclerc, La Poune, Les Canadiens de Montreal, Les Bougons… Do you understand???

Less and less…

Listen, forget all that crap. Ask me another question.

Ok, what town you come from?

Mmm…, I don’t know anymore…

You not know what town you come from?

Yes, yes, I know what town I come from, but my town it merge with another town, but soon it is going to demerge from the town that was supposed to be my town…

Oh, that very complicated! When you write your address, what do you write?

I don’t know anymore. Before, I used to write Hull, but Hull changed to Gatineau, but they tell us to wait 3 years before stopping to write Hull to not mix up the mailman. But now, the Liberals they pass a law that make it ok for Gatineau to be Hull again, but I don’t know if we have to wait 3 years to be able to write Hull, or when the 3 years are passed, if we have to write Gatineau for 3 years, and after we write Hull. Unless, of course, the PQ come back in power and we remerge with Gatineau, then we’ll have to write Gatineau for 3 years.

I leave now; I have hurt in my head…

It’s so simple Tabarnak: My town is Hull, my country is Quebec. But if you prefer, my town is Gatineau and my country is Canada.

OK, I think I understand!

It’s about time. Anyway, it was fun talking to you, if you come around where I live; maybe you come and see me…

OK, but where? Hull in Quebec? Or Gatineau in Canada?

You’re a pain in the ass. Forget the whole thing

H/T to my friend Sandy

Smile … It's A Joke

December 18, 2006Mulder

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she, like many other teachers, is a Liberal. She asks her students to raise their hands if they are Liberals too. Not really knowing what a Liberal was, but wanting to be liked by their teacher, their hands fly into the air. There is, however, one exception…a little girl has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different.

“Because I’m not a Liberal!” she reports.

“Then, asks the teacher, “What are you?”

“I’m a proud Conservative!” the girl says.

The teacher is a little perturbed now…her face slightly red. She asks the young girl why she is a Conservative.

“Well, my daddy and mommy are Conservatives…so I’m a Conservative too!” she responds.

The teacher is angry now. “That’s no reason,” she says loudly. “What if your mommy was a moron, and your daddy was an idiot…what would you be then?”

The little girl smiles and says…”Then I’d be a Liberal”

ARARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH … Just Shoot Me

December 17, 2006Mulder

So I got up this morning and flipped open the big 24 page Arar section in my Sunday edition of the Ottawa Citizen. For some reason, it just didn’t have quite as much information for me and the text just wasn’t cutting it for my audio/visual personality. (image is from actual Ottawa Citizen website)

This drove me to flip on the boobtube and I caught a couple of hours of CTV-Ararnet. For those of you not on digital cable … you lose!! But for some reason, they missed some of the choice audio clips that I was really looking forward to hearing today. (I read about them on Dear Arar, the syndicated advice column designed for people who missed out on past Arar events.)

So I proceeded to turn on my Sirius digital satellite radio to listen to the 24/7 Arar call in talk radio show called Arar You Sirius? and dialled in a few times to try to ask about these hidden audio gems. No dice. The lines were packed with angry callers from Damascus demanding photos of his Syrian passport.

So, I just did the same old, same old and visited the www.arar.youtube.com hoping one of the Arararrazzi caught some good cellular phone video footage that they uploaded. Now and then I find some really awesome audio to go along with the video.

Barring this, I will just have to catch that Gemini winning, CBC reality show Terror Error – The Maher Arar Affair. Season 5 is available on DVD in time for Christmas. (nudge nudge wink wink to my wife)

World History – As It Really Was …

December 13, 2006Mulder

It’s time for a chuckle.

I received the commentary below from a past boss and friend, an American conservative. It made me laugh enough that I just had to put it up for you all to read and enjoy. I did touch up the last two paragraphs for continuity of making it a blog vs. an email but other than that, it is intact as it appeared in my inbox.

Thanks Pete.

Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst forthe splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals; and 2. Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery.

That’s how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q’s and doing the sewing, fetching, and hairdressing.

This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women.

The rest became known as girliemen.

Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, grouphugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant.

Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.

Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals.

Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn’t fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat redmeat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, athletes, Marines, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today’s lesson in world history: It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to the above before clicking the “Email This Post” button below and forwarding on to friends.

A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be clicking the “Email This Post” link below to forward immediately to other true believers and to more liberals just to piss them off.

Peace Moonbeam Sums Up The Democrats View On Iraq Best

November 18, 2006Mulder

I really have to commend my left leaning, ultra sarcastic, flower child Americano friend Peace Moonbeam. She has a couple of new posts up that just have me in stitches. Below are a couple of quotes. Like these gems with regards to Nancy Pelosi and the Dems taking control of both houses and their plans on Iraq.

First and foremost, I asked her how quickly the Democrats were going to press their plan for victory in Iraq. Nancy said as soon as they think up a plan, they were going to ram it through. When questioned further, she said she was pretty sure their strategy would probably involve some sort of rapid retreat as soon as possible. “Our goal will most likely be an orderly and dignified exit like we did in Vietnam, only hopefully without the millions of people being slaughtered after we leave,” she said

You have to love her toungue in cheek style.

By far the most urgent need is to achieve victory in Iraq. As we discussed earlier, the only way to achieve this victory is to leave as soon as possible. Some prominent Democratic leaders have called for pullouts within four to six months.

(She almost sounds as right wing as Mark Steyn…now you know why I like her!!)

I’ve done some figuring and with the Dems’ proposed “Forces Leaving Early Expeditiously” plan (FLEE), I calculate over 378.3 terrorists will not be created every week we are gone. These men and women will instead most likely become professors, doctors, and nurses.

And the last word on the Dems lack of a plan on what to do about Iraq?

Troops out, lawyers in, build water parks. All better.

12 Step Program For Socialists

September 29, 2006Mulder

When I realized that socialism was destroying our nation, I was curious how other destructive actions were handled and how people went about fixing these problems before it was too late. Then it hit me. Our nation’s left needs a 12 step program. So below is my small part towards ensuring socialism doesn’t take over our great nation. It is modelled after the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 step program.

1. We admitted we were powerless over Socialism–that our lives had become unmanageable.

To admit that there are many factors that drew you to Socialism and to realize that it wasn’t your fault is something that must be accepted. Socialism is a devious and attractive thing. Few humans can resist the temptation to give all we have to a cause that shows starving children, bloodies harp seals, battered wives etc. over and over again. We are only human and our heartstrings can easily be pulled by this monster.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

There is a greater power that can bring sanity back to the confused socialist. This greater power is called Logic. Logic is something that is exhibited by conservative minded people who do not simply WANT the world to be a better place, but they actually can use Logic to help MAKE it a better place. The road to Socialism is paved with good intentions.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Logic, as we understood it.

Once you succumb to Logic and let it guide you, your actions will steer you away from socialism and towards a more sensible way of life.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

This is a tough one. We need to really look beyond the socialist traps like universal daycare, and universal healthcare, and realize that many socialist programs that are called “universal” are not truly universal. They are usually make work programs which is the socialist way of redistributing wealth. Tax the hard working citizens that are PRODUCTIVE TO THE NATION and redistribute that wealth to agencies and organizations that hire people who are unwilling to be “productive”. These agencies are leeches. They tear down the urge of “productive” people to make a better living. As more agencies form and the productive people hit their limits, the tax rate must rise to help redistribute the wealth. Eventually the tax rate will hit a critical point we call 100%. This is where a nation reaches pure communism. (A nirvana for Socialists).

5. Admitted to Logic, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

This is not hard. You can go join the local Conservative party EDA and just tell the person you speak to that you were a socialist but that you want to correct the error of your ways and join the party. They can help you.

6. We’re entirely ready to have Logic remove all these defects of character.

This one is easy. Once Logic comes into our lives, the defects of character which rear their ugly heads due to Socialism tend to whither by the roadside.

7. Humbly asked Logic to remove our shortcomings.

If Logic doesn’ answer your request, you can always find an island of sanity with the Lowell Green show on CFRA.com (Monday to Friday 9am to noon), or you can try Jeff Allen on 570news.com .

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

The list starts with stay at home moms. It includes every Canadian working for a private corporation. It includes everyone who has waited over a month for an MRI. It includes countless people who have had chiropractic or physiotherapy aid cut. It includes every child who has had mom, dad, grandma, a neighbour, etc watch them during the day. It includes every Canadian who has suffered wrongly at the hand of any criminal who is reoffending due to a lax criminal justice system. The list goes on and on and on.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Where to start? The list from number 8 is a good place. Warning, this one may take awhile.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

Again, Logic can help guide the socialist in this regard.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with Logic, as we understood It, praying only for knowledge of Its’ will for us and the power to carry that out.

We are starting to realize self-actualization by this point. It isn’t hard. Just believe that you can reach for and accomplish more than to work in a socialist job that provides minimal help while getting paid by tax dollars.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other socialists, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

You can help with step 12 by clicking the “Email This Post” button and sending this to a friend who is a socialist.

Robin Williams – Politically A Right Of Center Isolationist

August 30, 2006Mulder

(via email from my sister)

I am trying to figure out if this email I received has info that is pre or post Robin Williams checking himself into rehab, but in any case this is worth the read. I am also still trying to figure out if his views are left of center or right of center. My feelings are that he is definately right of center and an isolationist, with a few left of center points tossed in to the mix.

Check this out.

His T-shirt says “I Love New York” in Arabic. Only Robin.

RobinWilliams

“I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here’s one plan.”

1) “The US will apologize to the world for our “interference” in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those “good ole boys”, we will never “interfere” again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East , and the Philippines. They don’t want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They’re illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don’t like it there, change it yourself and don’t hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don’t need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5) No foreign “students” over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don’t attend classes, they get a “D” and it’s back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while ..

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not “interfere.” They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don’t need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us “Ugly Americans” any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH…learn it.or LEAVE…Now, isn’t that a winner of a plan?

“The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.” She’s got a baseball bat and she’s yelling, ‘you want a piece of me?’ “